Emotional Resiliency, Alison Zeidler Blog

I was recently listening to a presentation by Deborah Rozman, Ph.D. Howard Martin, HeartMath® Institute Leaders.  When we practice breathing in to and out of our heart, we begin to synchronize our brain and heart and nervous system – our entire being – into a calmer appreciative state.  This gives us the beginnings of emotional resiliency and shifts us into our hearts where new possibilities can emerge.

Our emotions are our own reactions to events going on around us or thoughts we have in our own minds; and our emotions are also choices we make, especially when we get triggered.  The concept that an emotional outburst by us is a choice can be hard for us to hear.  It’s so much easier to blame the other person, or our circumstances, or our past trauma. 

Do I have emotional outbursts - of course I do, I’m human.  But I’m learning to find out what triggers me, and more importantly, what lies underneath it. 

I think that I will always have triggers, and I will always have emotions about those triggers, but what I do next and how I respond is my choice.  Do I blame others, do I blame my circumstances, do I wallow in the anger or fear or misery and feed it; or do I choose to acknowledge that feeling and then find the place inside my heart where I can let it all go and focus on appreciation, on love, on gratitude.

Did you know that negative emotions can suppress our immune system for up to six hours?  It’s so easy for most of us to focus on what’s not going well in our lives, to only see the negativity and the struggle.  But this is a choice too.     

Did you know that the heart has also been classified as a hormonal gland? In addition to other hormones, it secretes as much oxytocin as the brain does - the love hormone. Ocytocin is also involved in reasoning and intuition, tolerance, complex relational behaviours and more.

Alison Zeidler

Positive emotions like love, compassion, appreciation and gratitude have a profound effect on our heart and allows us to be more intuitive and creative, increases our memory, builds resiliency and impacts our longevity.

Negative emotions like frustration, anger, anxiety and worry impacts our heart and decreases how well we think, impairs our memory and ability to learn, and speeds up our aging.

I remember when I was struggling with anger and depression for many years; it took a lot work and a lot of different methods, including counselling, cognitive behaviour therapy, anger management, Al-Anon and medication, but one of the best tools I found was when I was able to see even one “something” in my day that brought a smile to my face. 

I remember actually having to look for those “somethings”, and some days I didn’t see anything.  A turning point for me was driving to work and noticing this beautiful rainbow and actually seeing it and feeling it.  Not in an, oh that’s nice way, but feeling that beauty in my heart.  When I was able to access my heart with gratitude and beauty, my world shifted.   

I can still be negative, and I am still triggered, and I still can respond in a reactive way, but I’m learning to develop a better emotional connection.  

If you would like to work together, I would love it if you reached out and contacted me alison@alisonzeidler.com. If you’d rather book an appointment, click here

If we look for things that we can appreciate throughout our day, we are helping to re-pattern our emotional circuitry. By practicing feeling uplifting emotions, we can develop an emotional resiliency that makes us happier and more able to move through our daily lives.   

There are some free tools that HeartMath® puts out, and two that are really awesome are the HearthMath® Appreciation Tool™ and the Quick Coherence Technique® for Adults (https://www.heartmath.org/resources/heartmath-tools/).